busy mum - C-Change

The Best Season

Dianne on 15 December 2020

A hnda-written not reads "I love you so much mummy"

Ten thousand flowers in spring,
the moon in autumn,
a cool breeze in summer,
snow in winter.
If your mind isn’t clouded by unnecessary things,
this is the best season of your life. Wu-Men

From when the boys were little my husband and I had a habit of going in and checking on them each night before we went to bed. We would stand together at the foot of their beds and just enjoy watching them in peaceful sleep. Every time, we’d whisper to each other, ‘I wish they’d stay this age, it’s just perfect.’ But each year would roll by and we found ourselves wishing they’d stay the same in every delightful stage of their lives, except maybe late teens when we started going to bed before they did cause we could no longer keep the pace.

But I do remember that beautiful sense of enjoying them, loving them and celebrating the season and stage of life they were at, every year. It changed constantly, of course, but we loved the learning, the growing, the adventures, the discoveries, the ups and the downs and still do.

But there were many times and seasons when my mind was clouded by ‘unnecessary’ things and I, like many busy working parents, found myself struggling with anxiety, shame and guilt which blocked my vision, trapped me in damaging mind loops and left me weary to the bone.

In these times of loss of flow, hope and clear thinking I found my mentors to be life changing. I valued their fly on the wall perspective, their gentle but provocative questions, their support as I learned to let go of faulty thinking and their genuine desire to see me enjoy life to the full.

If you are clouded by ‘unnecessary’ and necessary things and desire to re-gain perspective and find the beauty in each season I encourage you to seek out a coach/mentor who can help you see that this could be the best season of your life.

There is a gift in everything if only we’ll see it.

What does ‘me time’ look like?

Dianne on 19 May 2020

I remember some years ago taking time out for a weekend away by myself. Away from my normal routine of washing, house cleaning, attending sporting events for our three active sons and all the other fun activities that crowd out a weekend before Monday returns with a dull thud.
Ah, a wonderful weekend of peace and quiet in a friend’s shack, all made possible after much planning, negotiating, list leaving and reminding myself, it’s not all up to me.
My first hurdle was at the supermarket on the way to my ‘retreat’. I walked up and down the aisles aware of a struggle to know what to buy for myself. I was so sure of what everyone else in the household liked but I had no clues as to what ‘treats’ or ‘staples’ I wanted for myself.
It was one of those funny moments of awareness that just maybe, I really needed this quiet weekend away, if nothing else just to remind myself of what I want to eat when I’m not focused on feeding the hungry hordes and their mates.
“Me time has gone out the door and I’m not sure when or how to get it back,” said a friend recently who was juggling working from home, supervising her children’s schooling and trying to get through a list of home projects because it seemed like a great idea at the time.
Would love to hear your answers to these questions as we consider more ways to bring healthy change to our lives.

What is ‘me time’ for you?
How do you re-charge the batteries?
How do you create those small but essential spaces in a day, week and/or month to re-acquaint yourself with your own needs, wants, feelings, interests and just cause moments?

And I must add that ‘me time’ does not mean just sleeping, pleasant as though that may be for some who are weary from the daily duties of life, and then some.

And my final question:

When was the last time you had some serious, high quality, replenishing, ‘me time’?(Photo of Paisley – Pipe Clay Lagoon 2020)